I asked my husband this morning what would make him feel spoiled. I was somewhat surprised that he had a difficult time with the question, but then, he explained that “spoiled” is something he thinks is an ongoing state, not something that happens on occasion.

So, to him, being spoiled is something that would happen all the time. Okay, I get it. I then asked what would be a daily activity that would make him feel spoiled and he said, “breakfast”. You see, if you know my husband, you know that he loves a good breakfast. Unfortunately, he rarely gets a good breakfast. I gets up an hour before I do during the week and so I’m usually still in bed when he leaves.

To make him feel spoiled, I would be getting up every morning and making him breakfast. Breakfast would consist of omelets, eggs benedict, pancakes, bacon, sausage. I think you get the picture. I do make breakfasts like this for him once in a while, but I probably should do it more often. After all, I would like him to feel spoiled!

What do you do to make your spouse feel spoiled?

Young lovers do silly things sometimes. When my husband and I were courting, we frequently left silly little poems on small slips of paper for each other. We then hid the papers in hidden places for each other to discover later, such as in a book or in a coat pocket. After 19 years of marriage, we still giggle when we recall those silly– and sentimental– moments of our early years.

Roses are red,
Violets are blue;
I’ll meet you at the park
Where sweet kisses are due!

Roses are red,
Violets are turquoise;
When we are together
I want to make lots of noise!

I think I made a poem for every color in the Crayola crayon box! But my husband loved finding these little notes in unsuspected places. He fondly chuckles when he remembers them.

If you’ve been together with your spouse for a long time, those silly little moments are easily swallowed up with other things. Building careers, raising children, buying a home, etc., come to the forefront and the sentimentality of romance and relationship are shifted to the back burner. We marrieds don’t intentionally neglect those times of sweet romance; it just kind of happens. So, it takes effort to stir up those sparks. Doing so can really revitalize your relationship and prevent entropy.

But how does one go about it? Sometimes finances are tight. Sometimes they are not! But whether you buy your love a new kitchen or sports car or a chocolate bar, what really matters is that you keep it personal. Your goal is to stoke those fires that burned during those early years. Sometimes all we have to do is shut out everything– the bills, the TV, the kids, the pets, the clamor of the day– turn off the lights, light the candles, and enjoy each other’s presence. Remember together why you chose each other to have and to hold, for better or for worse, til death do you part. Every relationship needs this kind of attention, but it seems the longer you are together, the more you need to do it.

Take some alone time with your spouse. You’ll probably have to schedule it in! That may make it seem “less romantic” but it needn’t be. Remember those early love notes or sweet things you did together. Stir up the embers of those first days, and before long you’ll have a steady flame going.

The entire idea behind Mother’s Day is for the family to spend that one day of the year to show mother how much she is appreciated. If you’re like me, ideas are sometimes hard to come by. What on earth can you get for the woman who has given up so much to be a mother? Flowers, cards, and chocolate are very nice, but they are… common. If you have an unique kind of mother, you need a unique kind of gift! Sometimes it helps to pen a little list down. Here’s mine, from the perspective of a mother. Perhaps some of these ideas will help you if you’re in need of some creative juices.

1. Time out of the kitchen and away from the dirty dishes.
This is probably number one, in my opinion. I have four children and wash a TON of dishes. Eating out or having a sumptuous dinner home-delivered is a big occasion and we mothers never seem to tire of it! It’s something that doesn’t have to break the bank, either. Coupons and discounts are available online and in local newspapers, and many restaurants offer special deals for mother.

2. A foot spa machine.
I don’t have one. (yet). My sister has one and she absolutely adores it. Judging by her rave reviews and fantastic-looking feet, I think any mother would love this!

3. A gift certificate and an afternoon at the stores.
I can see mother’s eyes now– first, the glassy eyes of unbelief; then, brightening eyes of elation; finally, a wild-eyed glassy look that tells you she’s already out the door. Just make sure it’s a generous gift certificate at a woman’s department store, not a $10 WalMart card (otherwise, she’ll spend it on groceries or vacuum cleaner bags).

4. No arguments at the dinner table!
I think this applies for mothers of young children and grown children. Nothing tears apart our tender little hearts than to see the siblings at each other’s throats. Give mom a break and bicker in someone else’s house, lol!

5. A gadget. Mothers are getting very high-tech these days. Something like a digital photo frame to display her darling babies one by one is nice. A new digital camera or video camcorder is better. Mothers put their hearts into their families, so a social type of electronic gadget is best.

Those are just a smidgen of things you can do for Mother’s Day. Remember, it’s really the thought that counts for Mother’s Day. Be thoughtful and get your mother what she would really like, and make it different. But don’t go over your budget! Mother wouldn’t like that!